Testo I Could Go Back

did i just think it, no
did i just write it down
when did i lean in close enough
i'd be invisible
it'd be comfortable
if i'd still see and hear you.
i could go back to my old way
i could go back to the doorway i see when the lights
and the air would touch
what for me
i think
would be too much.
did i just think it or
did i try saying more
did i put messages in my eyes
like bottles.
crawling back to my old way
i could go back to the doorway
the light hurts my eyes
and i get spent so
one day you'll say
"why didn't you say no."