Testo Do This Thing

KEVIN. Yo yo, Mathletes State Championships, what! First female ever on the team, what. A boxed lunch will be provided

KEVIN, MARWAN & ROWAN. What!

CADY
I CAN DO THIS
ALWAYS COULD
AND NOT PLAYING DUMB WILL SO DAMN GOOD THE MONSTER INSIDE NEEDS TO BE RELEASED
GOTTA DO WHAT I DO, GOTTA FEED THE BEAST

MS. NORBURY
GOTTA EARN SOME RESPECT
GRAB THAT BIG BRASS RING

CADY & MS. NORBURY
LET’S DO THIS THING

CADY, MS. NORBURY, KEVIN, MARWAN & ROWAN
LET’S DO THIS THING!

KEVIN
YOU’RE GONNA ROLL UP, STYLIN’ LEATHER ON YOUR SLEEVE
ALL-STATE CHAMPION, BETTER BELIEVE
MAYBE THE HATERS GONNA MAKE FUN OF YOU
ALL YOU CAN SOLVE’S THE PROBLEM IN FRONT OF YOU
HIGH SCHOOL’S A FOUR YEAR SOCIAL CURSE
BUT MATH’S THE FOUNDATION OF THE…

KEVIN, MARWAN & ROWAN
UNIVERSE!

KEVIN
SO SICK OF PLUCKING THAT SECOND STRING
THEN LET’S…

KEVIN, MARWAN & ROWAN
BEEP!
DO THIS THING!

CADY, KEVIN, MARWAN & ROWAN
DO. THIS THING!
DO. THIS THING!

CADY
I’M NO PLASTIC!

KEVIN, MARWAN & ROWAN
NO!

CADY
I’M NO BITCH!

KEVIN, MARWAN & ROWAN
NO!

CADY
I’M…

CADY & MS. NORBURY
A LEAN, MEAN MATH MACHINE
ON A MISSION!

CADY
I LOST WHAT I LOST
GOT TO START BRAND NEW

CADY & MS. NORBURY
GO ALL IN FOR THE WIN
WITH A CHILL, DOPE CREW!
GOTTA KICK OFF THE DUST

CADY
I GOT THE SCHQUILLZ TO THRILL

KEVIN, MARWAN & ROWAN
SCHQUILLZ!

CADY
LET’S DO THIS THING!

CADY, KEVIN, MARWAN & ROWAN
LET’S DO THIS THING!

ADJUDICATOR. Welcome to the ICMT State Final Math Championships, sponsored by no one. Each right answer is worth two points, and as always, no calculators
PLEASE SOLVE FOR…

KEVIN
X EQUALS TWO

MARYMOUNT #1
THE RATE IS TWO, PI

ROWAN
X IS GREATER THAN THE VALUE OF Y

MARWAN JITLA
BOTH POLYNOMIALS ARE SECOND DEGREE
SO THE ASYMPTOTE IS THAT Y EQUALS THREE

MARYMOUNT #2
FUNCTION X EQUALS M, X, PLUS C

KEVIN
THE DERIVATIVE OF F AT ARGUMENT Z

MARYMOUNT #3
NEGATIVE FOUR

CADY
NEGATIVE TWO

MARYMOUNT #1
THE SLOPE IS ZERO

CAROLINE KRAFFT
THE ANSWER IS TRUE!

MARYMOUNT #3
ONE POINT OF INFLECTION

KEVIN
TWENTY-NINE!

CADY
FOUR IS THE SLOPE OF THE TANGENT LINE!

MS. NORBURY. How you feeling?

CADY. Amazing!

MS. NORBURY. You’ve got this! Here, take a water

CADY. Thanks… Ah! Aaron, why?

AARON. Ms. Norbury asked me to help since everyone else is at Spring Fling. But since I don’t go to North Shore anymore…

CADY. Aaron, I didn’t write that in the burn book

AARON. I know, that was Regina, I forgot who I was dealing with

CADY. Well, I’m sorry you have to be homeschooled

AARON. Yeah, so’s my mom. (the sound of a buzzer is heard.) Go get ‘em. I like seeing you be awesome, I haven’t seen it in a long time

CADY. (to MS. NORBURY.) Ugh, why are you doing this to me?

MS. NORBURY. Because I’m a pusher! I know that if you can be your authentic self in front of Aaron, you’ll be able to do it for the rest of your life

ADJUDICATOR. Ladies and gentlemen, we have a tie. In the event of a tie we move into a one on one sudden death round, in which each team may choose their opponent. Marymount, who do you select?

MARYMOUNT #1. We pick the girl

KEVIN. We pick the girl too

ADJUDICATOR. Miss Krafft and Miss Heron, please step forward

CADY. Nice to meet you

CAROLINE KRAFFT. You’re going down, slut

ADJUDICATOR. Contestants, find the limit of this equation

CADY. Wait, it’s not me against you, it’s North Shore versus Marymount. And look, I’m not here to be better than the one other girl, I’m here to be better than all of you!...

CAROLINE KRAFFT. The limit is negative one

CADY. Shuck! Ah, I meant to say “shoot” and I almost said “fu…”

ADJUDICATOR. That answer is incorrect. If Miss Heron can answer correctly, we have a winner

CADY. Why did she waste energy insulting me? Why did I waste time judging your hair? This is not a competition

KEVIN. It kinda is though

CADY. Yes, right, right, a math one
IF WE BREAK, FROM THIS CRAP
THEN THE ANSWERS LAND IN OUR LAP
DON’T BE SCARED, JUST PERSIST
THEN OUR LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
NO, THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST!

ADJUDICATOR. And our champion, North Shore Mathletes!

KEVIN. (he rips off his shirt) You like that Marymount?!

CADY & MS. NORBURY
AND DON’T IT FEEL GOOD
TO HAVE GOTTEN THIS FAR?
IT’S NOT SOMETHING YOU DID
NOT THE GIRLS YOU ARE
YOU CAN HEAR THE FEAR
UPON YOUR HEART JUST SAYIN’
“JUST DO YOUR THING.”

AARON, KEVIN, MARWAN & ROWAN
ALL YOU SOLVE’S THE PROBLEM IN FRONT OF YOU

CADY & MS. NORBURY
DO YOUR THING

CADY, MS. NORBURY, AARON, KEVIN, MARWAN & ROWAN
LIVING FOR ME, NOT DANCING FOR NONE OF YOU
DO. YOUR. THING!
DO YOUR THING!