Testo Great Life Caper

I ever tell you 'bout the time I had to solve this case Some crab motherfuckers straight invading my space It was approximately 8:47 pm I was on my way home coming back from the gym My muscles kind of aching They felt rigid and stiff But my mind was at ease from this Coltrane riff Playing loud at a shop right on Fulton and Troop Till a Jeep drowned it out with Xzibit and Snoop As I get closer to the heazy, baby, Certain parts of my body started acting crazy My ears got to twitching, and my right hand shook I had a sudden need for speed, so I decided to book As I arrived on my block to see a bunch of kids Scoping out my building, Noticing the door wide open I jetted up the stairs, past signs of forced entry, Expecting to see my humble abode stripped empty Yo, hell no! Yo, my trip from the front door To the second floor Had me feeling so alone, embarrassed, and insecure My worldly possessions that I cherished and prized Flashed in a matter of seconds before my eyes But not photographic, more like alpha-numeric, You know, VCR, TV, Laptop, Z3, VS, MP, LP, CDs, RL, P&B, N-I-K-E Not to mention USA or RC3C To open up in DC For Run-DMC It's gotta be a nightmare, Somebody pinch me! But up the stairs I see, My 10-speed GT Right where I left it, rather bizarre Still felt violated; my apartment door was ajar As I stormed in thinking it's about to be on, The window was wide open... but nothing was gone! As I dashed to the edge, Held my head past the ledge I seen two hooded figures flipping over a fence They was way beyond capture, so I took a step back So I could figure this shit out cause it was getting' intense The computer was on, file cabinets wide open Bookshelves was tipped over; they searched, but ain't steal Wait a minute! This picture from my built-in safe Was slightly tilted to the side, I was beginning to feel The same tingling in my ears and hands Everything else in the house was there, so work with me one time But my instincts failed me not, the safe was blown wide-open, They stolen my priceless book of rhymes! Oh, hell no! Ah, shit! I been hit! Elizabeth, this is the big one Fuck it, these niggers got me pulling out my big guns So be it! They want it, they got it, but can't have it Dagnabit! The last thing I needed was static! But I got a briefcase for just such an occasion So I grabbed it, Jetted downstairs, Hailed a cab I knew the shit was gonna happen, I was getting too nice From the briefcase I pulled out a homing device Three times better than Lo-Jack These MCs is so wack And now they gotta resort To stealing my text?! As I fixed on their position For my intercept mission, The cabbie was feather-footed, it was getting me vexed As we headed towards Jersey, the signal got stronger, Even in the tunnel I was right on they tail A green Volkswagon had the nerve to blast Braggin' [???] A dead giveaway, now watch justice prevail I told the cabbie, Get closer, but he had no heart Next thing I know we was, like, five blocks apart But they was headed for the airport, the getaway plane Traffic was getting thick, so I got out and ran Followed the signal all the way to this private hangar These niggers want to rendezvous with a Learjet I drove a luggage cart to block the runway, to no avail, They pulled out just in time but I'm not done yet Yo, watch this! You think you're getting away, thieves? I know every rhyme in that book. You got five seconds to turn around. It's like that? Aight then! If I can't have it, no one can! (Explosion)